australiana

its the heat. I forgot how hot Australia could be. I've spent the last few days reaclimatizing to our awesome, searing heat. And many other things, like pissing in a big trough at the pub next to all the other drunks, who want to say g'day and engage in akward urinal conversation. Then there is the complete and utter unrestrained gambling. At forster pub in a room of about fifty blokes who where there for no other reason than to bet on the horses, and the pokies room, which is a room full of slot machines for my american readers. Every single bar has at least 10 slot machines, and the clubs have a few hundred--and the ability to bet on horses or keno. I once heard a statistic that New South Wales has 10% of the worlds slot machines, and i couldn't believe it to be true. But seeing as other developed countries put some sort of restriction on gambling, i can now see it. In the USA if you want to gamble, unless online, you pretty much have to find an illegal bookie, or go to either Las Vegas or Atlantic City.

And the rotaries, or round-abouts. We are about as unrestrained in the random round about placings as we are with our voracious gambling. In the woolies carpark they had tiny round abouts placed every 20yards or so. These would prove no match for the giant american SUV's, who could drive over them and pretend they weren't even there. I didn't really see any hatchbacks in america, and our toyota landcruiser is considered a midsize suv in america, im talking about the mighty Dodge Rams and the F350's.
--- everythign in Australia looks so brown at the moment, we need some rain bad, even places on the coast look bad. It was funny too, seeing a show on a current afair advocating people to piss outdoors if they live in semi rural areas, to save flushing water. Which reminds me, the toilets have no water in them over here. I don't know about europe, but in the US, the bowl is 3/4 full of water to start off with.

VB the trip home from the airport was tops. As promised Jim had an esky full of VB's and then some cigars once home. I had a great day, and being reunited with my labrodor Portia was pretty cool. I had the john williamson cranking too! 'hey true blue, will you tie it up with wire, just to keep the show on the road.' 'Is it a kangaroo, or just vegemite?'
While i was overseas, it seemed to take a long time, and now im back, my mind has compressed eevrything, so it only seems like i have been away about three days. Ill have to work on getting my green card, so i can go back to the south. And j-roc you'll be proud that my confederate flag is going to take pride of place on the wall in the lounge room, so while im watching the tele i can remember that 'the south will rise again!'

i could keep blogging, but seriously, who wants to hear about my latest trip to the post office?Now im back to regular life- this was re-afirmed, when after spending an incredible adventurous week in San Francisco, i return home, to find my mother completely in raptures while telling me a story of returning a dvd to woolies. It was the 'big' event of the week. Back to the doldrums of reality. Thinking about the fleeting time i spent roaming about the USA, and having wacky adventures, each more wacky than the next. Now it seems like a dream.

i have some more photos to post, so ill do a few more posts in the coming week.

Quotes
'it's got carbo's for energy!' - nutri grain add. Another classic aussie shortening. Carbo's mate. (we really do butcher our language, if a word has 3 or more sylabelles, dont you worry we will make short work of it. just cut it in half and add an 'O' or sometimes an 'A' for example registration becomes 'rego'. or the classic 'ies' such as, woolworths becoming 'woolies' or poker machines becoming the 'pokies')