for those about to rock

this is for those handfull of people still checking my blog, i drank yesterday on australia day, and was wearing thongs at the brewery and had to get katrina to sneak lachlans shoes downstairs to me waiting in the pokie room, so i could go up, it lasted about 20 minutes before the bouncers found me, anyway i wasn't going to drink today but my olds just bought home 32 bottles of wine. which is 3 cases, th deal was you buy 2 cases and get a third free. God doesnt want me to stop. lol. like when the poats were playing and i told my old man to bring me a tiny jim beam bottle home, because i know i cant stop spirits when i start, and he brings home two big cougars, because it was buy one get one free. and i drank 'em both!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iLLuQkovnRk check this link out, its morris skating on the homemade skate ramp we build at my place. I couldn't stop laughing!!!! now its there for the whole world to see it!

it always happens with my tattoos, people say what does it mean? thats what i get 100% of the time when i show someone my tattoos, and the deal is, i have no fucking idea what that bit of scribble on my arm means, just as i dont know why people are dying from hunger, and i dont know what the fuck i am doing in my life-and i dont mean just getting a job and knowing what im doing as a career, i mean as a person-who do i want to be as a person and what do i want to believe in.
And when i see a girl wear a pair of earrings i dont ask what is the significance of the
pattern of the star shape in the metal that she has adorned on her lobe. No and you know why?because it seems like a temporary display, yet tattoos seem permanent--as permanent as we can get in our fleeting lives that come to an end in the blink of an eye, to quote meet joe black where anthony hopkins at his b-day speech says '65years, don't they go by in a flash,' So we like to hold onto things, and people say well how about when your 60 and you wont want the tattoos, i have two responses to that. the first is
that i love it now, and if im worrying about what im going to look like when im 65 then its safe to say im not at all living in the moment, and secondly im going to have about a million other health related issues by that age which will keep me preoccupied. I think peeing 8 times a night and shitting in a bag will be more important than worrying about a tattoo-which i had 40 good years with,

i have not once-ever regretted getting inked i love everytime i look at it. But onto the grander point about the human condition as realizing that we are fallible but
still thinking in schemas mentally that try to put a permanance on the present moment. I think once you realize that the bus can hit you tomorrow, not just know it consciously but truly realize that you can die at any moment, then you can fully embrace it. And this isn't just some pop psychology bullshit(carpe diem and seize the day and all that shit), this is about not ever fucking appreciating what you have right this very second and always looking to tomorrow. Why not look at what you have today and feel at peace, then plan for tomorrow. Because i agree you do need some planning otherwise you'll end up like chris farley who drank and boozed and partied and died at 33, but even
then he had one motherfucking time while he was alive! amen. Personally i dont like a whole heap of tats, i think it looks like someone has spilt ink on someones arm, i like a few without being crowded. Its all personal, and to me it reiterates the temporary nature of life.

anyway, i found the rocky quote that i loved. I found out too we havent got it in australia yet, i watched it about 2 months ago in the grand old USA!! and it comes out next month here, but this quote was my fav part of the movie, where sly is talking
to his son who is ashamed of him for trying to keep going, fucking brilliant. I love how he brings hobbes into it,--the world--- its a very mean and nasty place, and when sly delivers it, what a great movie.
The world is one hard motherfucker of a place, and we are all tryign to find our place, and some of us die and some try to succeed but we're all just fucking restricted to getting food, water and air. You get knocked down, and you have to keep moving forward, just like rocky says. And his son was blaming him, but rocky is like, dont blame me, i know your strong stand up and be it, or you might aswell die.

Quote from rocky

Let me tell you something you already know. The world ain't all sunshine and rainbows.
It is a very mean and nasty place and it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it.
You, me, or nobody is gonna hit as hard as life. But it ain't how hard you hit; it's about how hard you can get hit, and keep moving forward.
How much you can take, and keep moving forward. That's how winning is done. Now, if you know what you're worth, then go out and get what you're worth.
But you gotta be willing to take the hit, and not pointing fingers saying you ain't where you are because of him, or her, or anybody. Cowards do that and that ain't you. You're better than that!" - Rocky Balboa

dammit

i still can't take it, i had a huuuge american day, and the pats lost. I made the best damn nachos australia has ever seen. I made them buffolo wild wings style, and i had a whole heap of budweiser. So it was just like being in america, when i used to ride my bike from my dorm down to the sports bar on a sunday to watch fooootball! eat some nachos and drink some beer. But this defeat has weakened my spirit, i don't know if i can go on, especially to watch the superbowl, its all too much. I still think ill boycot the superbowl, even though we will have our new bigger TV by then!!!

but i will be watching WWE royal rumble over the weekend, its set to be huuuge, john ceno is set to defend his title, but during the week on raw, he got hammered against a table and ruptured a spleen while battling a huge samoan guy. This was one of the 'real' injuries in wrestling, ceno tried to get up and stumbled around and vomitted, then some docs came in, and i have watched enough wrestling to know when its real. And for one they didnt declare a winner of the match, which they dont if someone seriously gets hurt, like when stone cold steve austin broke his neck.

and onto tattoos. I like my one on my left arm, but it isn't substantial enough, im looking to get a big celtic circle pattern on my right arm, or some sort of ornate cross, im not religious but i think a big cross would look pretty nifty. -and put me in good stead with the lord ;) like the dad from shallow hal who says - 'son find a classic beauty, with a nice can and good totties, and that will put you in good stead with the lord.' !!! awesome!

p.s fuck the colts! they can go and get fucked, and fuck a goat. and lose the damn superbowl, go the bears!!!!!

popular demand???

okay, due to popular demand (3 people) and the fact iv been drinking since 6am when simmo knocked on my window to watch the nfc championship in the nfl, and now its 2am, and simmo like a softcock slept from 3pm till 6pm, sorry simmo but its true, and i was drinking the whole time. Anyway , the new england patriots lost in the last minute to the fucken colts, and simmo was wearing a colts shirt, so fuck him, fuck everyone even the i-ties!!! lol just kidding. But seriously i have never been so distraught over the loss of a football game, i.e i have never cried over sports and not in the last three or so years, but there is a first for everything. And i put my heart and soul into the patriots and they lost in th elast freakin minute, and anyone who knows me, knows that i dont give a fuck about any other sport except the NFL, and this was my day to shine and brady fucked it for us, go damn it.

and also i just learned that ZOO magazine has awarded the sheik an australian of the year award. Ok, the patriots made me cry, but this makes me so fucking upset that i will vow to destroy anyone who still buys ZOO after this, i dont give a fuck that he might support terrorism or say that muslims deserve australia more than convicts, who killed aboriginals but like Mary Bryant many tried their fucking hardest to make a life, after mother england fucked them over, and they made this country, so anyone who wants to diss convicts is a cunt and fuck it makes me madd, but other than that, and i respect aboriginals (who i caught the train at 3am the other night and they showed their true colours, red for blood, but i dont care, it was the worst train ride ever, worse than going through purfleet near taree, not really) anyone can do whatever they want, i dont care, and i haven't any right in their business. I mean if i was paid to go to school, if i had some red black and yellow blood in me, and got into pretty much any uni course ahead of people who actually get some decent grades, i would still drink..... fucken not!!! I'm going to be a teacher now, for anyone who doesnt know, and get some scratch baby.

But when the sheik says that chicks who wear bikinis deserve to be raped i draw the line. Seriously, this country is about freedom and if people are trying to limit that because of religion, no matter what stoooopid religion it is, christian, muslim etc.. that's just fucked. People who take the scripture and twist it to justify their own warped ideas are fucked, no matter if your a sheik or an evangelical. Seriously if you need some sort of comfort to help you through this cold,short and harsh life (hobbes) don't fucken' push it onto people who dont want it. And this might be a fucken lightbulb... but australia doesn't want their chicks to cover up!!! and if you want that, go the fuck somewhere else, because that is the who we are, and that is our country.

It's bad enough that women are oppressed in other places, and people accept it because of 'ingrained culture', (fucken lefties, its just the way things are, and i shouldn't change things and maybe help some people be free of tyrants, i'm too busy calling the yanks tyrants) but if you are trying to implement it here it's stoopid. The race riots were missnamed. If it were true race riots, it would be about kicking out the thousands of asians who help lift up our economy (and congrugate in sydney)or the indians who drive our cabs, thats a stereotype-- but true, It was about their behaviour!!!, about them not wanting to be part of who we are.

And i cant stress enough that we are a multicultural society, but we dont accept behaviour that denegrates women, and certain other values. And there was a certain group, (and dare i say, a whole group of people who came from the same area and looked the same, that participated in gang rapes and general social disturbances) but no i cant say lebo's because that isnt PC, well fuck you, i dont care what you look like, its not race-- its BEHAVIOUR. You can't just terrorize aussies and call them skippies-in a derogitory manor- without offending what it is to be Aussie. Australians aren't racist because we didnt protest any other group, we don;t care about any others, but the lebos, because of the way they acted ----(after ww2 we accepted many germans and after that, the greeks and many eastern europenas, hmm i wonder why, maybe because they assimilated and accepted our values), ----- because non lebo groups weren't walking around openly harrasing women. You have the odd bad seed, but not leaders in communities openly knocking the values which we call Australian, and condoning such viscious attacks against civilians. Now some will take objection to what i say, and if they do that's good because that is what free speech is all about. Its about expressing yourself, without hurting others--end of story.. Do what the fuck you want, but don't hurt anyone else, particularly women or ill be in the carpark!!!!!

Hypocritcal, no, because i am dog the bounty hunter and i am the law, and the law punishes those who hurt women. Well it should unless you're unlucky enough to be in stupid freakin' Vermont. (the judge there gave a disgusting sex pervert only 30days after spending two years sexually abusing a 2 year old till she was four yrs old, and you know why, becaus ethe judge says that the jail didn't have proper rehabilitation. It was fucking serious, and everyone went nuts, and they governor quickly implimented a rehap plan, so then the judge gave him three years. Fucking activist judges, 3years for torturing someones life - which is abominable, but 60days to start off with, seriously what the fuck has happened to justice. 3 years is about 20 too short, that's why we need Jessica's law, ''in the usa'', which is 25 years minimun on any sexual offence on a child. But fucking vermont and other 'democrat' states (the equivilant to the labor party) don't want it. So in a sense they are condoning it. Fucken sicko's, and you wonder why i vote republican and bush??? hmmm, like the superannuation plan which gives people freedom to expect high gains from their own money, and also to punish sicko's and criminals.

okay so ill do some more trave blogs later, i still have some good pics of alcatraz to show. But if you have any opinions on the above let me know.

australiana

its the heat. I forgot how hot Australia could be. I've spent the last few days reaclimatizing to our awesome, searing heat. And many other things, like pissing in a big trough at the pub next to all the other drunks, who want to say g'day and engage in akward urinal conversation. Then there is the complete and utter unrestrained gambling. At forster pub in a room of about fifty blokes who where there for no other reason than to bet on the horses, and the pokies room, which is a room full of slot machines for my american readers. Every single bar has at least 10 slot machines, and the clubs have a few hundred--and the ability to bet on horses or keno. I once heard a statistic that New South Wales has 10% of the worlds slot machines, and i couldn't believe it to be true. But seeing as other developed countries put some sort of restriction on gambling, i can now see it. In the USA if you want to gamble, unless online, you pretty much have to find an illegal bookie, or go to either Las Vegas or Atlantic City.

And the rotaries, or round-abouts. We are about as unrestrained in the random round about placings as we are with our voracious gambling. In the woolies carpark they had tiny round abouts placed every 20yards or so. These would prove no match for the giant american SUV's, who could drive over them and pretend they weren't even there. I didn't really see any hatchbacks in america, and our toyota landcruiser is considered a midsize suv in america, im talking about the mighty Dodge Rams and the F350's.
--- everythign in Australia looks so brown at the moment, we need some rain bad, even places on the coast look bad. It was funny too, seeing a show on a current afair advocating people to piss outdoors if they live in semi rural areas, to save flushing water. Which reminds me, the toilets have no water in them over here. I don't know about europe, but in the US, the bowl is 3/4 full of water to start off with.

VB the trip home from the airport was tops. As promised Jim had an esky full of VB's and then some cigars once home. I had a great day, and being reunited with my labrodor Portia was pretty cool. I had the john williamson cranking too! 'hey true blue, will you tie it up with wire, just to keep the show on the road.' 'Is it a kangaroo, or just vegemite?'
While i was overseas, it seemed to take a long time, and now im back, my mind has compressed eevrything, so it only seems like i have been away about three days. Ill have to work on getting my green card, so i can go back to the south. And j-roc you'll be proud that my confederate flag is going to take pride of place on the wall in the lounge room, so while im watching the tele i can remember that 'the south will rise again!'

i could keep blogging, but seriously, who wants to hear about my latest trip to the post office?Now im back to regular life- this was re-afirmed, when after spending an incredible adventurous week in San Francisco, i return home, to find my mother completely in raptures while telling me a story of returning a dvd to woolies. It was the 'big' event of the week. Back to the doldrums of reality. Thinking about the fleeting time i spent roaming about the USA, and having wacky adventures, each more wacky than the next. Now it seems like a dream.

i have some more photos to post, so ill do a few more posts in the coming week.

Quotes
'it's got carbo's for energy!' - nutri grain add. Another classic aussie shortening. Carbo's mate. (we really do butcher our language, if a word has 3 or more sylabelles, dont you worry we will make short work of it. just cut it in half and add an 'O' or sometimes an 'A' for example registration becomes 'rego'. or the classic 'ies' such as, woolworths becoming 'woolies' or poker machines becoming the 'pokies')

Go the patriots!

the new england patriots will demolish the new york jets in their first playoff game tomorrow, its on 1pm , wait im on the west coast now, so it might be 10am i better check into that. Kansas city chiefs are in the playoffs too! Ill be wearing my patriots jersey at the sports bar, and probably get booed seeing as this is 49er country. I was getting excited about placing a bet on the game,completely forgetting that its only legal in vegas and atlantic city, i could go to chinatown and find some underground bookie. The patriots are about 7-1 to win the super bowl according to some dude on the street, who wouldnt tell me his bookies phone number. Its great odds, so if you feel like making a bet go to the tab and put everything you own on
the patriots to win the superbowl.

On thursday my travelling companions being girls went and got manicures and pedicures and stuff, so i made a grand plan of seeing the whole city on the trolley system. I got down to the end of the street, walked into a bar and got on the piss-plan failed. It was the vesuvio bar, the one i mentioned earlier that all the beats like karouac used to frequent. And the bar chick was 38 and stunning, and there were some old irish dudes i was having a yarn to, and one of them was about late 50's and very old and greasy looking, anyway the bar chick walked up and kissed him. And it turns out they are a couple, i was amazed. So after she finished her shift, all us irish folks went to nearby irish bar o'reillys, and the barchick was teaching me all about the hippy heritage and the sexual revolution that occured on haight street up the road, and then she asked if i knew jefferson airplane, and i had heard of them form the forest gump soundtrack and a simpsons reference. she then told i had been talking to the jefferson airplane dude, who was sitting next to me at the vesuvio.

On friday i went to alcatraz, and did the audio tour. I was surprized to learn that it only operated for thirty years between the 1934 and 1963, and that only 1500 prisoners were ever there. With its capacity only being 256 or thereabouts. Al capone and the birdman stroud and a few other famous dudes called it home. After taking the maitland jail tour, and now alcatraz, i would have to say that i would rather be housed in alcatraz. After the tour we watched The Rock. 'im sure you understand the etymology behind the name goodspeed.' -my favorite connery quote. and 'loser whine, and winners go home and fuck the prom
queen.'

-tomorrow i think ill go to hyde street, which is the steep hill that the cable cars go up and down, and that nic cage flew down with his ferrari trying to catch connery in a hummer. 'dude you just fucked up your ferrari.' 'it's not mine.'

i saw Rocky Balboa today. it was terrific. old rocky still felt like he had something in the basement. It was really well made, and its amped me up to start lifting weights again when i get home, seeing as i havent even down my pushup routine for many months, now my arms feel so small. And back in the motel in DC i saw Invincible, with mark walhberg about the bar tender who made it onto the philly eagles team. It was great too, one of the best gridiron movies ive ever seen. Both of these films are about people who are beat down, and keep going. I wish i could remember what rocky said today, to his son, about life hitting you, and its how you keep going and dont blame others.

-ill put up some alcatraz photos and more on the next post.

Quotes: i think i worked out my favourite simpsons episode -the beer baron (it used to be the grease raquet)

Homer: "We're going out, Marge! If we don't come back, avenge our deaths!"
Marge: "All right."
*
and my favourite, i cant remember it properly but its when homer goes to buy the bathtubs to make the moonshine in, and he says
'ill have 48 bathtubs please.'
'sir, we have a special today if you buy 50.'
'i'll have 48!'

melroncisco

San Francisco is like a giant byron bay with some melbourne elements thrown in. They have a tram sytem but also an alternate vibe going on. The beat museum is just next door to the hostel, and the bar where jack karouac and ginsberg-i think is his name- first read their beat poetry. I love the seagulls, they are huge.
The golden gate bridge is actually pretty unimpressive. There is another one called the bay bridge, which is much larger and more formidable.

This is post number 100, im a blogging centurian! first post for the new year and number one hundred. I wonder if this means that the blogspot queen will send me an email. Thats probably the only reason i would want to live until the ripe old age of 100, just to get a letter from royalty. You have to urinate in a bag and eat only pureed food, and forget who your children are, but the letter from royalty makes it bearable. By the time i am one hundred, it will probably be from one of prince harry's illegitimate children, or the republican movement will have caused us to break away from the monarchy. Long live the queen!



The seagulls are giant, this guy was getting stuck into a crab. They are four times the size of our seagulls, i guess its all the prison time they do in alcatraz. Working out all day.












This is the presidential christmas tree, its about two hundred yards from the white house. See all the model trains underneath. I could be showing a cool photo of the giant marine one picking up the president but i didnt have my camera that day, so all i have is this photo of a tree from the night before.












Im staying at the green tortoise hostel in san francisco. There are strip joints and erotic shops everywhere. This is a mural on one of the walls. Even in a nice bar last night, with a nice band and classy patrons, they had the walls covered with naked pictures of showgirls.












Alcatraz from the ferry.











How cool is this chicken! Id like to have a drink with him one time, it looks like he enjoys a nice red wine.